Today Ben and I went out with some friends. I think we were within social distancing requirements (although they change from day to day). We were outside, and there were a total of five of us. We walked through the woods and parkland near to the apartment of one of our friends.
Pre-corona, we would have gone back to his place for a glass of wine (he has a better wine collection than my Ben), but this time we went to a beer garden which has a few large umbrellas. By the time we reached the pub, we were soggy and the wind had picked up blowing squally rain from all directions.
Our friend with the huge wine store has worked in the entertainment industry since he was a teenager. I wanted to ask his advice today. Over the years I have burnt my fingers every now and then with my use of the internet and social media. He has been using social media since it came into existence. I would credit him with having a professional attitude towards it. He seems to know he has to use it and does so adeptly.
That was not always the case. I did know he has had to deal with some negative aspects of social media. He has two court injunctions/restraining orders out on fans who started stalking him. I know some other issues that caused him anxiety. I wanted to get something off my chest with him today. He gave me his tips on riding the bull that is social media without getting too battered by it.
He made Ben and me laugh when he told us of how he got carried away with social media when he first set up his accounts and tens of thousands of people started following him within a couple of days. He said the instant feedback from fans was like a sugar rush. He wanted more and more. So he went on a splurge of photographing everything, his socks, his ties, his drinks, selfies wherever he went. Every photo was receiving hundreds of comments. He became hooked on it for a while, until it became problematic.
So then he withdrew. He went quiet and stopped posting. But then he wanted to promote some of the work he was doing for charities. So he started posting again, but this time with a new set of rules for himself. He thinks he matured in his use of social media.
Ben ribs him a lot. The guys get on like brothers. I like that Ben and he get on. Years ago, I had the most massive crush on him, and I did try to flirt and flaunt myself in front of him, but was mortified to find he had zero interest in me because he was in love, in fact he was lovesick, over another woman, a woman who became a good friend of mine, set up a blog on WordPress a few years ago, and is now my primary social media guru.
Looking back to when our friend was overdoing it on Instagram, I think I was getting sick of his posts appearing in my feed, and I had a crush on him. Other people may have found his frequent posts even more irritating. Then he vanished, his account was still up there, but there was nothing new from him for many months, which I associated with the drama he was having in his personal life (mega-complicated drama). At that stage trashy newspapers and websites were saying all sorts of crap about him. When he came back to social media, he seemed to maintain a mysterious air and his photos were more arty, to give clues without revealing too much about where he was. It was clear he was being guarded. But I remember thinking he seemed even cooler than he had before. The air of mystery added to his image.
I showed him the RASPBERRY RIPPLES blog on his phone and he laughed at a lot of my posts – the bundt-head! He did give me advice on how to view the public domain though. He kept telling me to imagine it is a bull and I am daring to have a try of bull riding. He warned me not to be too confidant, and to expect to get thrown about. He also told me that if the bull does knock me to the ground, to get out of the way while it bucks and snorts. I may need to recover from my bruises but I should be glad I am still in one piece and lived to tell the tale.
Ben and I were talking in the car on the way back. Ben thinks I should make some rules for myself with the blog. He thinks it is effecting my emotions too much. I am not so sure, I think it is more the dark and the cold that are making me feel sadder. I like having this creative outlet. A friend of mine who blogs keeps telling me blogging can be like a big party with lots of strangers. It’s easy to get very excited and carried away. She has given me lots of tips on blogging and more recently (I think Ben has asked her to) she is encouraging me to keep blogging in its place.
I am sometimes like a kid, full of energy and exuberance with anything new. Then I either get my fingers burnt or I burn out and go down in flames! It’s good to have people who know me looking out for me and giving me kind advice.