The Desire Of The Eyes And The Desire Of The Flesh

As soon as I saw the TELL ME ABOUT… theme was “DESIRE”, I knew that I could write an entire novel in reply to this prompt. There are so many directions I could go in. But I am going to try to keep my response concise (well, I will try!)

My first thought was THE DESIRE OF THE EYES. When I was younger I went out with the most good looking boy I knew. He was so handsome – complete male eye candy! Every girl my age and their moms were jealous of me. I still wonder why he picked me when he could have had his pick of so many girls that had a crush on him. There must have been something about the teenage Jenna Kirkpatrick that he approved of. As for me, I was hooked the moment I laid eyes on his perfect features. The physical attraction was huge!

I have no regrets about our relationship, and I would not want to be unkind about him. But I am glad things ended when they did. I learnt that real love has to go beyond THE DESIRE OF THE EYES. Even though I was going out with the most good looking boy I knew, the desire to be with him waned as things other than physical attraction. Our personalities were jarring. The fact we had such different outlooks was becoming more and more of a problem.

Years later I would meet Simon. My relationship with Simon has to be defined as a period when I was governed by THE DESIRE OF THE FLESH. What a sex machine he was! I mean wow! Simon knows how to do sex and foreplay. Even the first night I met him, which was the first night I had sex with him, it was exhilarating. It always was. What a lover! I was consumed with my DESIRE for him. When it came to satisfying my sex drive/desires Simon went above and beyond, and I have a feeling he will continue to inspire more erotica writing from me for a long time to come.

Sadly, just because the desire of the flesh was being taken care of very well, it did not mean everything was ideal. The main issue was simply that I wanted to be his forever. I wanted to marry him, care for him, his home, his everything. I wanted to give my absolute all to being his devoted lover, his number one sidekick and partner in life. That’s what I wanted. Simon was not looking for any partner in life. He wanted to live the life of a randy bachelor and sleep with whoever he wanted. Although that was most often me when he was here, it pained me when I realized I was not the only one. THE DESIRE OF THE FLESH was not enough.

Since I met Ben….well he is eye-candy. Sorry Ben but you are! He is gorgeous. He full satisfies THE DESIRE OF THE EYES. As for THE DESIRE OF THE FLESH – oh yes! No issues there in any way. But Ben goes beyond that. He understands the DESIRE to feel loved, to feel treasured, to feel secure, to feel anchored, to feel safe and to be inspired every day by sharing a purpose and working together as a team to accomplish that. We are building a life and a future together and that is nourishing me in ways more satisfying than ever before.

Ben understands me, the inner me. The inner me that is made up of emotions, deams, hopes, ideals and DESIRES. He has his own DESIRES. I find continual joy in getting to know Ben, the inner Ben and all of his emotions, dreams, hopes, ideals and DESIRES. It’s a joy to satisfy them…but to also leave him DESIRING more!!!

There are so many different ways I could have interpreted this prompt. But the more I thought of all the different ways we might feel DESIRES and seek to have those desires satisfied – I thought about my own DESIRES as I have matured into adulthood. The DESIRE OF THE EYES and THE DESIRES OF THE FLESH can be very profound and can influence our decisions…but for me they were not enough. I discovered that there were other DESIRES, perhaps deeper DESIRES, that would change my direction in life and will be the major motivation behind my decisions from now on.

Tell Me About … Desire #46