“It takes courage to love, but pain through love is the purifying fire which those who love generously know. We all know people who are so much afraid of pain that they shut themselves up like clams in a shell and, giving out nothing, receive nothing and therefore shrink until life is a mere living death.”― Eleanor Roosevelt
I was thinking about courage. I honestly do believe we are supposed to love and to feel loved. I think we thrive when we feel loved. Loving others brings out the very best version of us. However, so many of us have been damaged in some way. It’s sad, but from an early age our ability to love and to feel loved can be impaired greatly.
A bruised heart, a broken trust, a shattered illusion…they tend to make us harder, colder, determined not to jeopardize our heart again and get scratched, burnt, crushed like before.
It can take great courage to love….or I should say to love again perhaps. We put our heart into the hands of another person. If our heart has been injured before by someone else, trusting somebody else can take enormous courage. It’s not a step to be taken casually. If you give a bruised heart to an absolute brute, they will leave you in an even more damaged place.
Then there are those of us who are in love, and have a very loving relationship, and are terrified of losing it, because we know, we know that within this relationship we are thriving….and we know that were we to lose our lover…we would likely shrivel up into a faded decrepit heap, and not begin to know how to live without them.
Sometimes it is within a loving relationship that we have to find courage. It can take courage to say, “I love you so much, but I have a different opinion.” It can take courage to admit, “I am sorry for my choice of words. I regret hurting you.” It can take courage to say, “I forgive you. I am letting go of this hurt will not mention it again.”
Yet that is when a relationship grows from strength to strength. When two people who love each other refuse to give up, they courageously face challenges together, they resolve misunderstandings, they sincerely apologise, they forgive and let go of hurt, they support each other through tough times.
True love calls for courage – it calls for real heart.