Self Care

Over the years I have not always cared for myself properly. Perhaps that is part of growing up, learning that you cannot push your body, your energy and your emotions to their limits – or you will break. Many people have broken – perhaps in the form of a “nervous breakdown”.

Others have just become so close to their crisis point, their stress limits, they make a decision they regret – they walk out on a lover, or their family, or a job or something that perhaps they feel is no longer providing them an ounce of enjoyment, and in fact seems to be bringing the very worst out of them.

I think lots of us have stories we could tell. I learnt the hard way that I had limits. I learnt that I needed to take some time out to take care of myself in lots of different ways. But I found it hard to get used to.

Why? It might sound strange, but there was an element of guilt in saying no to others so that I could say yes to my own needs. In addition, I have been through stages in my life when I strongly disliked myself. That may sound strange, or you might well understand what it is to hate your own self, and feel strongly that mankind would be better off without you on the planet.

If you don’t like yourself, if you are harbouring guilt or self-disgust, if you don’t care whether you wake up tomorrow morning, it can be very hard to see why you should take care of your physical health and the appearance of your body. In a way, those feelings are a real indicator that you are long due a comprehensive self-care treatment.

True self-care starts on the inside. There is no better pillow than a good conscience. Peace of mind and heart do wonders for your all-round health. Having a sense of purpose and believing that you are loved, or that you are forgiven, can be incredibly energising.

I realized over time, that for me personally, I was never really going to be fully happy with myself. Learning to be content has been a huge achievement. But caring for myself had to have a reason to motivate me. I found a reason in accepting that I had people in my life who genuinely loved me and wanted me to be as happy and healthy as possible. I began to actively care for my mental, emotional, and physical health.

Sleep, relaxation, a balanced diet, fun, inspiration from creation and learning to love people with all their quirks and imperfections has been so good for my heart.

Ben’s love is a huge motivation to me. I want to be the best version of me. I want him to have a gorgeous girlfriend (he just whispered “partner”, but I told him that seems so civil), and I want our life together to be joyful and rewarding. Now caring for myself is part of my giving to Ben….and it is the motivation I need to care for all aspects of my health.

10 replies on “Self Care”

The burden of feeling as if we have not been forgiven (either by our-self of someone else) is like a huge boulder that we carry round. Forgiveness brings wonderful peace of mind and energises you. But it is sometimes very hard to forget our mistakes and believe we are worthy of forgiveness.


A very well thought out piece, personal musings which ring true for me and others I’ll bet. I’m glad you have turned the corner and are caring about yourself and for yourself now. We owe it to our loved ones. xx

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And although putting others first is a wonderful thing and can bring joy – the problem comes when we have made no time to care for our own emotional and physical wellbeing. It makes giving to others so much harder if our own fuel tank is running on empty.

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